Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

How do I stop someone from forcing/pestering me to become gay/bisexual when I already want to be straight?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Why do women change that much more with age?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Does turmeric help fight cancer? If so, how?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

What is it like to be the slave in a mistress-slave relationship?

I can count

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know who the president of Turkey really is

If we do not know the name of the father of a child, e.g. a foundling, an illegitimate, etc., then to whom should the bin or the binti of the child's name be applied?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Who is the greatest light welterweight boxer of all time?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why do gun lovers think their right to own a weapon supercedes everyone else's right to be safe and not be shot?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t buy bullshit

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I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What are the pros and cons of arranged marriages?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I have complete contempt for traitorism

How do I find a transgender girlfriend?

I see through liars

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

During the Atlmark incident in 1940, the Brit war criminals violated Norwegian neutrality. Hitler could then justify invading Norway. Have the Brits ever apologized for violating Norwegian neutrality?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

What does the Turkish word çıplak mean?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Do polyphenols in mushrooms fight cancer or cause side effects?

I can read

I understand how hurricane paths work

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What is the best sex you have ever had (in detail)?

I have a reading level above third grade

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I actually pay taxes

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”